Hell In My Hands

Yeahhh.
Don't let me go.
I'm still in here.
Walk in carrying
Half the night.
Coat still dripping.
Collar too tight.
Somebody catches
The wrong nerve.
Head turns first.
Then come the words.
Can't take them back.
Can't make them small.
They hang between us.
I hear them fall.
My own voice sounds
Like someone else.
Know that tone.
Know it too well.
Jaw on the broken
Edge of a tooth.
Blood in the mouth.
Nothing to prove.
You've done nothing.
I know that much.
Still my whole body
Braces for a shove.
Where do you go
When your eyes go cold.
Somewhere I know.
Somewhere I won't.
Not taking you there.
Hell in your hands.
Ice in your veins.
I know you're in there.
Say my name.
I hear you calling.
I'm coming through.
Don't let me go.
I'm reaching for you.
I won't make you
Carry my war.
Don't let me go.
I'm here at the door.
One winter night.
Rope pulled tight.
Couldn't see faces.
Couldn't see sky.
Weight on the harness.
Boots breaking crust.
Someone behind me
Held when I dropped.
Never saw who.
Never asked why.
Just felt the pull
And followed the line.
Now it's your voice
Cutting the room.
Nothing to grab.
Still pulling me through.
Thumb off the knuckle.
Palm starts to ache.
First thing I loosen.
First thing that shakes.
Look at the window.
Look at the rain.
Find where I'm standing.
Say your name.
Where do you go
When your eyes go cold.
Somewhere I know.
Somewhere I won't.
Not taking you there.
Hell in your hands.
Ice in your veins.
I know you're in there.
Say my name.
I hear you calling.
I'm coming through.
Don't let me go.
I'm reaching for you.
I won't make you
Carry my war.
Don't let me go.
I'm here at the door.
There's a sick relief
When anger takes.
No room for grief.
Nothing to explain.
One easy second.
Let it all burn.
Then live in the room
Where nobody returns.
Stay where I can see.
Stay here with me.
Can't promise quiet.
Can't promise sleep.
Can open these hands.
Can move my feet.
Then come back.
Come back.
I'm coming.
Hell in your hands.
Ice in your veins.
I know you're in there.
Say my name.
I hear you calling.
I'm coming through.
Don't let me go.
I'm reaching for you.
I won't make you
Carry my war.
Don't let me go.
I'm here at the door.
Don't let me go.
I'm still in here.
Don't let me go.
I hear you clear.
Red through the window.
Rain on the floor.
Coat off my shoulders.
Hand off the door.